Shah Rukh Khan may be the rank outsider who got crowned the Badshah of Bollywood, but once again, the Empire Strikes Back! Ranbir Kapoor, Sonam Kapoor, Neil Nitin Mukesh, Sikander Kher, Mimoh Chakraborty…. A fresh crop of the Bollywood progeny rappel down from imperious heights.

Although, so comprehensive is their cross-pollination that it’s hard to trace their lineage from the bio-diverse, intertwined thicket, referred to as the Family Tree...nevertheless, major or minor, whatever branch you swing from, if you’re related to somebody up there, you’re allowed first shot at stardom.

Says an irate early morning blogger: “What’s with these guys? Everybody is related to somebody in this industry. Do they have a reservation policy down here too?’
So what’s new? It’s all a bit like an Anu Malik composition. You’ve heard it before...
In the ’40s and ’50s, when Mumbai’s new Film Royalty let down their Heir Apparents, there was some delicate self-conscious coughing into the kerchief and a wee murmur of protest…. But Prithiviraj Kapoor’s sons, Raj, Shashi, Shammi; Shobhna Samarth’s daughters, Nutan and Tanuja; Naseem Banu’s Dresden Doll, Saira; S. Mukherjee’s son, Joy…all met directors of steel who would brook no nonsense and eventually after some heavy duty pasting (they hadn’t invented the word abuse then), by the likes of director, Kedar Sharma, whose slap Raj Kapoor remembered decades later – the star kids finally made the cut.

But in the late ’70s and early ’80s, the periodic whining and griping rose to a Grade 4 Storm of Protest because star kids galloped in, in droves reminiscent of the gathering at the Kumbh Mela! Raj Kapoor’s sons, Randhir, Rishi, Chimpu; Dharam’s sons, Sunny, Bobby (a couple of years later); Jubilee King Rajendra Kumar’s son, Kumar Gaurav and the great Nargis and Sunil Dutt’s kid, Sanjay; Manoj Kumar’s son, Kunaal and brother…Rajeev. Dev Anand’s son, Suniel Anand; Shashi Kapoor’s sons, Kunal and Karan and daughter, Sanjna…etc…etc…. The strugglers of the time actually contemplated forming a union against the locust swarm of the Star Sons.

But that’s the way the wheel turns. At regular intervals we’ve been inundated by a fresh Tidal Wave of star kids with lineages that can be traced back to the time the first caveman drew a picture on the wall.
We’re now joined by offspring of dynasties that are not just in the business of acting. They sing, they direct, write music, wield the camera....

The new millennium saw a mind-boggling swarm of spawns. Salim Khan’s son, Salman; a few years later, Sharmila’s son, Saif; the first of the Kapoor women, Karisma, then Kareena; Rajesh and Dimple’s daughters, Twinkle and Rinke; Tanuja’s daughter, Kajol, her cousin, Rani; then the other daughter, Tanisha; then the other cousin, Sharbani…all made up the Mukherjee battalion...Dharam and Hema’s daughter, Esha; Amitabh and Jaya’s crown prince, Abhishek; the original Khans’ kids, Fardeen and Zayed...not to mention the emergent directors from stately gharanas like Rajeev Rai, Aditya Chopra, Karan Johar, Bunty Behl, Rohan Sippy, Farhan Akhtar, Sohail Khan. There’s even some activity reported down at the perennially in hibernation RK camp…and they’re all hooked up. It’s either the Malabar Hill Mob, the Pali Hill People or the JVPD Jammers who grew up dancing at each other’s birthday parties ever since they emerged from the birthing unit at Breach Candy, holding hands…how do you break into this confederation?