Been there, done that, yes. Yet, young Indians seem to have gone miles beyond being just jaded or laden with ennui. Victims of the too-much-too-soon syndrome the media loves to cover in its constant update of the malaise, their situations are frighteningly familiar. Children from well-heeled families steal to afford the latest cell phone model, stage their own ‘kidnappings’ for moolah to buy more gizmos or high-end designer togs or loll at special salons where stylists dance attendance on them as they sit transfixed at PlayStation consoles paradoxically placed beside cuddly toys.

Unheard of, moan concerned grandparents. What’s next, mutter child psychiatrists.

And then there is the classic ‘like parent-like child’ explanation. Mirroring the mood of the times, we may have unwittingly led the over-indulged little loves of our lives into a materialistic mess of our making. How widely off the mark is it to believe that behind every self-absorbed brat lurks a pushy parent or two, who vicariously light up their (often undistinguished) own path with ‘achievements’ they’ve prodded kids hard into attaining?

Academic brilliance isn’t the sole success chased, though it’s sometimes ranked stressor number 1. An obsession with looking good has brought skin-deep superficiality proudly centre stage among 300 million of the Indian population that is under 15 years. Pander and primp, goes the mantra. Dieticians complain parents reduce children no more than 10 years old to starving with break boxes of low-carb snacks and punishing gym exercise regimes, simply to land plum modelling and movie assignments. Coveted end-of-exam treats and birthday celebrations for kids aged six to 14 are pre-paid beauty sessions at fashionable salons like A Cut Above Children in Chennai and From Tears to Cheers or Watermelon in Mumbai. The take-home gifts are gleaming vanity cases, of course.

More dangerously, this preening isn’t reserved for an occasion. Two sisters of 10 and 14 visit a Franck Provost branch for facials ‘at least a couple of times in a month’, reports a recent India Today report titled ‘No Kidding’. The hopes are hardly restricted to the super-rich; middle class aspirations are quickly mounting just as high. Thanks to a steady stream of clients like these, spas rush to offer summer holiday packages with attractive discounts for the bacha brigade’s hair colouring and skin lightening demands.

Look around. Not that far, as it happens. The competition begins at home. Many a gum-chewing, age-defying ‘yummy mummy’ – as she’s dubbed in these days of international icons like pouting Posh Beckham – uncannily resemble the peroxide heads and impossible curves of Barbie dolls which their prettily painted daughters clutch underarm. As manicured mamas drive overloaded lasses and lads from a string of activity classes (we know of these numbering three per day) to etiquette classes (we swear) to sessions teaching them how to win at birthday party games (we’re serious), there isn’t the faintest furrow on those maternal brows. Simply because it would take an ultimately tenacious line to be let in there, what with the stretched-cat look botox routines have sealed over their faces.