It is not often that you can put an exact date on things but when it comes to fixing a date on exactly when Mumbai's psyche had been badly battered, it's easy - after the riots of December 1992 and January 1993. There is no doubt in my mind that these were the events that broke the spine of any courage the ordinary citizen of this city ever had.

Courage is easy to fake when the enemy is an outsider, from foreign shores, where he or she cannot see your face. True courage is when you stand in front of an enemy who will remember your face forever and yet you stand up for your rights. Mumbai, me included, ran for cover those days…13 years ago. The city hid, elegantly, by forming disaster relief committees; hid, craven, by remaining silent in the face of fascism; hid, panicked white, as it scrambled to run, to survive the day. It took Justice Srikrishna to finally say it. His report found that all major political parties, most notably one political party, in some cases in collusion with members of the Mumbai police, actively encouraged the rioting. The end of the orgy left not only 1,788 citizens (mostly from a minority community) slaughtered; it dismembered, once and for all, any guts left in the Mumbaiite's belly. Kheema. Bheja. Gurda. Kapura. Fried. Chopped. Burnt.

Then the sprinkling of dhaniya. In 1995, the city was renamed Mumbai. Why? Where was the grass roots movement that made this a burning issue for the 'Bombayite'? No survey taken, either by the government or private agencies, ever showed renaming the city beating civic amenities, water and rising prices as the issues most critical for the average citizen. I do not recall reading about any self-immolations taking place for this 'cause'. Besides, the city was already called Mumbai in Marathi (ask me, my mother was Maharashtrian), just as it was called 'Bambai' in Hindi.

So, what was the need for a change? The fact that the voice of the Maharashtrian had to be heard? No argument with that. But I challenge anybody to say that a name change for the city was the most pressing issue in the Maharashtrian-'Bombayite's mind in 1995. And yet, when the state government's proposal was announced, the Centre acquiesced meekly and then only when the poles that held the 'Mumbai' sign up at the Gateway of India had been erected, was the bent over 'Bombayite' told he could stand.

So buttoning up, we brushed the humiliation off our trousers, bravely smiled at our neighbours from other cities and excused ourselves as we had to rush to our next appointment. We are Mumbaikars, you see, finely honed soldiers of the nerve centre of the country. No time to waste. Swallow the violation and move on. Nobody saw. And if they did, so what. Mere baap ka kya jaata hai? Besides, tere baap ka kya jaata hai?