Illustration: Maitri Mody

Yes, she dangles Turkish evil eye bracelets, ten carat whopping emerald drops from Kothari’s and Chanel chandeliers with equal ease, but the original Bombay Blinging Belle is really so much more than a regular glitterbug, opines Nisha Jhangiani…

Bling is an attitude, a philosophy, a religion, a stance. To proclaim that Bombay is way more hip than Mumbai, and hence still perfectly admissible, to allow the daily milk quota into the house only in beautifully carved, sterling silver vessels from Ravissant (now so politically correct too, with the plastic ban furore), to sigh enviously over Britney Spears’ Versace baby clothes collection and to vow to at least procure one Tarun Tahiliani choli for baby Tiana’s Diwali mehndi session at school - this mystifying melange of seemingly eccentric attributes all blend smoothly into the ‘impossible to ignore’ Bling persona.

Take Bela Devnani* for instance…besides the Sindhi surname, which automatically allows part entry into the Bling coterie, her personal head-to-toe, inside out advertorial spells the B-word in Swarovski capitals. Bela religiously has Rita Mehra’s* crunchy almond rocks wrapped and sent to her hairdresser’s kids so that they get their favourite fortnightly chocolate fix (Bela, however, does not yet know the name of the woman who has been living next door to her since the past ten years). Bela is an avid buyer of Shaila Rajvir’s* semi-precious jewels that has the Blingers going gaga at the moment - never mind that an aquamarine rock with six miniature smashed diamonds retails for Rs 80,000, its all worth the price tag when blue is ‘in’. Bela will sport the humungous king of a ring with her slapdash ‘free’ purchase of a cotton tiered skirt from Linking Road – anything less than Rs 5,000 qualifies as free, at Rs 200, grabbing this roadside garment is nothing less than a grand triumph. This feat was achieved by bringing a speeding Mercedes to a screeching halt, when minutes ago, a bunch of four togged up beauties were yelling at their now deaf driver to race to the JW Marriott for a brand launch that was supposed to start two hours ago. Bela’s clever mix of bling luxury and grunge will help crown her ‘trendsetting fashion princess’ instead of the usual ‘fad following moneybags’.

HOP ON TO THE BLING BANDWAGON!

Everybody who’s anybody overloads her bags with shopped treasures while on holiday. To be a true blinger, jumpstart the platinum card swapping by buying ‘essentials’ for the actual getaway… another metallic tote with an extra customised zipper pocket for your pink Nano ipod, gold and turquoise balis to complement the Missoni beach dress you bought last year to wear on your next vacation (foresightedness is an admirable virtue of a bling babe) and so on.

Strutting around with your pet pooch, à la Paris Hilton is hardly newsworthy anymore...try a pure-breed Persian cat instead – felines adapt better to diamond collars anyway.

It’s a bit difficult to whizz through our choked streets in a stretch limousine but your swanky sedan should at least be fitted with a mini-refrigerator that stocks enough champagne (only Cristal will do) and imported blue cheese. Leftover caviar from that dinner party can be added too, and nobody will be the wiser.

Never travel light. Never sample roadside bhel (Sea Lounge at the Taj Mahal Palace & Tower will offer an equally tangy version at 50 times the cost). Never have your Burmese ruby collection valued – it only proves you have a collection limited enough to be appraised. Go for regular spa treatments to detoxify – all the better if you can make it to the Bliss spa in San Francisco for your Ayurvedic oil massage and hot chocolate soak (if Hollywood needs it, so do you).

* Names have been changed to protect identity of person – for fear of theft of latest, limited edition Lalique vase and Roberto Cavalli flashy dress (which would anyway confuse thief concerned, since neck-to-waist removable buttons are currently being used as handbag charms to tout ingenious style brainwave).

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