They (men) all have a cradle-born desire to sleep with a DD cup 6 feet 2 inch, reed thin blonde called Heidi from Sweden

All women complain about men but we can’t seem to live without them. Is this ranting about the inadequacies of the male sex just an exercise in futility, wonders Nayantara Kilachand

An evening spent in the company of ten men, three bottles of Jack Daniels and a few hundred Marlboro lights and this is what I discover about the intrinsic nature of Indian men:

• They all have a cradle-born desire to sleep with a DD cup 6 feet 2 inch, reed thin blonde called Heidi from Sweden with severely limited English language skills. Though during a drought of aforementioned Heidis, other Scandinavian nationalities will suffice.

• Perseverance is the key. The motto, ‘if at first you don’t succeed try, try again’ was coined in desperation by a certain young man when the charmingly frigid object of his affections had yet again shot him the evil eye.

"It figures," snorted a friend of mine when I told her. "But you know why men choose good-looking women over intelligent ones? Because they can see better than they can think." In the absence of a member of the male sex to defend his species against this bitter raillery, I felt obliged (to avoid criticism of sexual bias) to offer a rebuttal argument. "Surely there have been several instances of a woman choosing a fetching young Narcissus over his plain Paul nerdy kin?" I asked. "Of course," the friend retorted. "But these women usually act on a whim and then a few years down the line when they have to take a lot of crap from their husbands, they inevitably regret it."